Pigs as Ironic Public Relations Mascots Advocating Their Own Species' Consumption by Members of the Species Homo Sapiens

Fact.
This is the best blog entry EVER by anyone ever who isn't a deity or TV's LaVar Burton.

I was running through my standard set of non-news links, the ones I hit around midnight every evening, and I found this entry on Yahoo's The Spark! blog. Okay, vaguely interesting, I know. Then I noticed the link to this - The National Hot Dog and Sausage Council. That's right. The National Hot Dog and Sausage Council. I have little doubt I'll be spending hours on that site. Seriously. No fooly. Compelling literature.

And tail-gating advice.


Ahem.

Regardless, the NHDSC (acronymrific) made me think of something from my childhood that, frankly, after years first in Charlottesville and then in Knoxvegas, I had almost forgotten about.

(Singing)

B - A -Double L - A - R, D, S spells Ballard's . . . Ballard's is the JONX for me. . .

Okay. I don't remember the song exactly. But Ballard's products (straight out of Wayne, WV) dotted meals of mine for the better part of my childhood and their advertising campaigns dominated my evening television experiences on WVVA - I mean, in between the actual shows (specifically Cheers and The Cosby Show . . . sigh). And seriously, check out the packaging - its like, wow, you know it is good, because those pigs wouldn't lie. Dammit.

Speaking of trustworthy swine . . .


This in turn reminded me of another major producer of pork and pork by-products, those irrepressible folks from Salem, VA (kinda'), Valleydale Farms. Their website is worth exploring if for no other reason than their small but pimped out collection of archived commercials. Featuring pigs. Playing instruments. In celebration of the purchase and consumption of their less talented kin.

I mean other pigs.


Okay, now that I'm pretty darn deep into this blog, does the fact that our species uses cartoon images of the animals we're eating to advertise the animals we're eating freak anyone else out? Not bad, just a little, like, maybe while you read this blog? I dunno' - its just kinda' sadistic. I mean, we're basically using Porky Pig's illegitimate kids to advertise the sale and consumption of other illegitimate kids of pigs, though these have neither readily observable entertainment value nor good representation.



Whatever. Cancel.




When the war comes, let no man question whether or not I, Eric Drummond Smith, am still, and forever shall be, Big on the Pig. Peace in the Middle East.